“Oh, for the gift that God could give us, To see ourselves as others see us” -- Mom
          

This is another of her favorite sayings, and it has been burned into my memory from repetition. There were others, but I will spare you for now. In the words of the Landmark Forum program, “We live in the eyes of others.” We are not as we see ourselves, but in fact we are as the world perceives us, and it is important and valuable to us to bear that in mind.
           
While we are not as everyone sees us because some may look at us with jaundiced eyes from some past experience, we are as the collective views us.  What a gift it would be, perhaps, to be able to see ourselves as others perceive, judge, and evaluate us. We could certainly learn where we can improve. But equally as important, we could learn how we are doing well and appreciate ourselves as others do. Poor self image is the source of a lot of our defensive and counter-productive behaviors.
           
It is a rare thing to get honest feedback, in business and in life. It may be even more rare to be able to process what can be painful, or at least uncomfortable to hear. I recall vividly Steve D, from Hasbro telling me that we weren’t showing them what they wanted to see, what they needed, and that they were going to stop coming to see us. So we changed.
           
Hasbro told us they needed a Cabbage Patch Kid feature doll concept, we came up with one for them, and they loved it. When they lost the license, we were sure the doll would die, too, but they made it as a non-licensed baby boll, Baby Sip n Slurp. (Never ending thanks and gratitude to my dear friend Ralph Marciano, who wouldn’t let it die and wouldn’t let Hasbro drop it.)
           
Baby Sip n Slurp went on to be a hit in the 80’s and was brought back successfully only recently. She is considered by doll experts, in the words of the legendary Spanish doll company Jesmar, "A great doll."

All of this occurred because we could hear and pay attention to the criticism of our work. Hasbro helped us to see ourselves as they saw us, and the result was one of our greatest product successes.

 

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